Just as Stubborn Read online

  “He’s fine,” I said taking Gabe’s hand to pull him from Caleb’s reach. “Please don’t do anything here. Let’s listen. You’ll like this.”

  Gabe fell into the chair, and it almost tipped over. He turned the bill of his cap forward and rubbed a thumb over my knuckles as I sat beside him, knees touching. When I looked over, he grinned.

  Tessa appeared and crossed the stage to hand a glass to the woman. I raised a hand and waved at her when she spotted me in the shadow. She froze momentarily, as if I startled her. She nodded and almost knocked over the microphone stand. As she exited the stage, her eyes held on our seats.

  I was certain Gabe would enjoy listening. He seemed unusually cheerful.

  “How about some lights, y’all? I’ve misplaced my glasses,” the guitarist said as she turned to address the side stage.

  I heard Gabe’s breath suck in. He stopped rubbing his thumb over my hand where the skin grew numb. The stage lit one section at a time, first from the sides and then from above. Caleb coughed and pounded his chest. I could feel his heat radiate from behind my head.

  When I threw a glance over my shoulder, I saw him set a hand on the back of Gabe’s chair. “Are you okay?” I asked.

  “I’ll have to get back to you on that one, legs.”

  “You don’t look well, Caleb.”

  He bit his lips into a line. I couldn’t tell if he was going to break out in laughter or fall over. He looked as if he might puke his guts out all over the floor. He looked like he needed a breath of fresh air, yet he continued to hover over Gabe.

  I returned my attention to the stage. Gabe’s hand squeezed mine. His leg bounced up and down.

  “Now you too? What’s going on here?” I asked.

  He didn’t respond. I tried to shake his hand off mine, but he held it down with all of his strength.

  “My hand, you’re hurting me,” I whispered.

  The guitar melody filled the room in a mesmerizing way. Gabe released his grip. When I examined his face, he wore the same blank stare as Caleb. He wasn’t blinking and he looked as if he was holding his breath.

  “She’s good,” I told him. “I knew you’d be impressed. Maybe Tessa will introduce us.”

  Caleb placed a hand on Gabe’s shoulder, and in a split second, Gabe pushed it off, stood up tall, and towered me.

  My heart pounded between my ears. They were going to fight in a public place. But over what?

  “Settle down,” Caleb said. “Let’s talk about this, little brother.”

  Gabe didn’t turn to face him. He watched the stage. The woman, engrossed in her practice, appeared clueless that her first guests were about to christen the place with a bloodletting, fist fight.

  I thought I saw Gabe’s chin tremble.

  “It was gonna happen sometime. We just didn’t know when…or where…or how,” Caleb said at my ear.

  I turned around and looked up. “What are you talking about?”

  The look on his face baffled me. The woman ended her tune, and Caleb began clapping slowly at first and then in a loud, obnoxious rhythm that echoed through the room.

  The woman slid off her stool and looked out at us. She used a hand to shield her eyes.

  Caleb finished applauding and leaned into Gabe’s ear. “Think she remembered to get me a birthday present?”

  At that Gabe hurried toward the door. I got a glimpse of his face, his pinched eyebrows. I’d never seen him so rattled. I wondered if her tune reminded him of Eli’s guitar playing.

  “Gabe!”

  I thought for a second he figured out what happened between me and Caleb at the cabin. He pushed through the door, and I was on my feet chasing him, chanting for him not to leave.

  He pointed a key at a blue muscle car parked beside Caleb’s Raptor. It beeped, and then he opened the long door. He slid in as though he was familiar with the vehicle. I ran around the trunk as fast as I could and called for him. He started the car and revved the engine hard.

  “Gabe! Please stop,” I wailed as I pounded my fist on the door.

  I forced my breath out in a gust as he unlocked the door. I slid into the passenger side, and he turned the radio on. My heart fell into my stomach.

  “What happened?” I said winded.

  He reversed out of the parking spot before I could pull on a seatbelt or ask what he was doing in the car.

  “Gabe, oh my god. Why did you run out? Where the heck did this car come from? Did you steal it?”

  He didn’t take his eyes off the road. As soon as the coast was clear, he tore out of the lot and gunned the engine so hard we shot back in our seats. It sounded like an airplane taking off. The tires chirped as he went through the gears.

  “Gabe! You can’t drive like this!”

  I fumbled with my seatbelt as he took a corner too fast and threaded the car into freeway traffic. I had to clasp my hand on the door handle to keep from jostling around as he hit the brakes and then shot around every car he nosed up to.

  “Please. Stop already. What are you so angry about? Why did you run out?”

  I was certain we were in a Mustang. There was a pony on the center of the steering wheel and it drove like a missile launched through a crowd.

  “Gabe, I’m scared,” I told him as he pulled out into the fast lane and gunned it around a tour bus. He slid back in line when another car blocked his way up ahead. “Where are we going?”

  “Home,” he finally answered.

  His boot stomped on the brakes so hard I shot forward and slammed my wrist into the dash. Soon enough we were speeding onward into another pack of motorists.

  “Why are you doing this? Can you please get off the highway? We’re going to die. My parents don’t even know where I am.”

  He sighed loudly. We shot out from behind a pair of motorcycles and crossed back over two lanes and drove down an off ramp.

  “Happy?”

  “No. I want you to stop this and talk to me. Please,” I pleaded.

  “No.” He revved the engine offensively when the van in front of us missed the green light.

  “You can’t treat me like this.”

  “You climbed in on your own.”

  I wanted to pound my fist on the door, but my hand throbbed.

  “Let me out or I’ll jump out. You’re really scaring me, and I don’t know what happened to you. One minute you’re walking in that bar all happy and now you’re acting like a crazy person.” I twisted in my seat and rested my forehead against the window. I wanted him to reach over and touch me. I needed him to say something.

  The light changed, and he drove through a business section a little too fast for the congested road and pulled into a parking lot. I didn’t look up or remove my head from the glass. I didn’t want to talk anymore.

  I listened to his door open, waited, and then through my peripheral vision, watched him walk to a light post and slide his spine down until he was crouched on the ground.

  I pushed open my door. After a few minutes, Gabe looked up and adjusted his cap to shield his eyes from the sun. His gorgeous face twisted into a scowling expression.

  “Gabe, I—”

  His hand flew up to silence me. I clammed up at first, but then I decided he couldn’t shut me up that easily.

  “I don’t understand what happened to you, but I want to understand,” I said as fast as humanly possible. I was just as stubborn as he was, but I was better at it.

  “I got nothing to say.”

  “I hate seeing you like this. I’m so confused about everything. Sometimes you make me want to run back home and forget this past year ever happened.”

  He listened without comment and played with the embroidered R on his cap. It hurt me that he didn’t respond right away.

  “I wanna get out of here and never come back. Can we go?” he muttered.

  “Yeah,” I answered right away. “Can you not drive like that anymore?”

  He straightened and wiped off his jeans.

  “I gotta get out of
here before I lose it.”

  I followed a few steps before he turned around on me. He stood so close that my toes just about stepped on his. I was pretty sure he already lost it.

  “Just don’t ask, okay?” he said.

  “I can’t help it. You stole a car and something serious must have happened before you came in.”

  Gabe rolled his eyes and held my shoulders tight.

  “I didn’t steal the damn car, Av’ry. It’s a rental.”

  “But I need to know wha—”

  “Christ, Av’ry Ross,” he barked. “Let it go. You’re so stubborn.”

  My cheeks burned. The knot in my throat hardened.

  “I want to help you. I love you, Gabe. Can’t I help?”

  Gabe stepped back and pursed his lips so tight his eyes crinkled in response.

  “No. You can’t freaking help me.”

  “But I don’t understand,” I groaned.

  “You don’t need to.”

  “Why can’t you tell me?” I half blurted, half shrieked with tears in my voice.

  He stared, mouth gaping, his hand rubbed his arm as a distraction.

  I stared back as I collected myself and tried to calm my heartbeat. Neither of us blinked. Neither of us closed the gap. A minute passed. And then another.

  “That woman on the stage,” Gabe began.

  “The guitarist? She was so good. I thought you would like her.”

  Gabe dropped his gaze for a moment and kicked at the loose gravel under his feet. He shoved his hands into his pockets and glanced up.

  “Like her? That woman, Av’ry…she abandoned me.”

  My shoulders fell and my eyes widened. I wanted to run my hands around his waist and hug him. The last thirty minutes of confusion quickly turned into understanding.

  “Your…mother? No way.”

  Gabe’s pained expression answered me.

  “How…I mean…why is she here?”

  “I don’t know,” he snapped.

  “Are you sure it was her?”

  “Hell yeah,” he mumbled into his hands. “She looks the same. I knew her voice. Her hair’s still red like it was.”

  “And Caleb knew too,” I said. “I thought he was sick. What’s your father going to say when he learns you found her?”

  “If you want me in your life, I’m not saying nothin’ to nobody. If he finds out she’s alive, he’ll—I don’t know.”

  “You don’t think he’s over her yet? He’s marrying Meggie.”

  “No. I think he’s the way he is because of her up and leaving. Wanna see him worse?”

  I shook my head.

  “Does she know about Eli?” I asked.

  “She doesn’t deserve to know. She wouldn’t care.”

  “I can’t believe this. What are the chances we ran into her?”

  “I’m done looking.” He drawled. “I’m heading out. Forget about the girl. It’s no use.”

  I agreed, but I had other pressing concerns. “What about the baby? And Caleb?”

  “Swing through Texas and see the baby if it’s born. I don’t give a damn what Caleb does.”

  “Don’t you care about getting to know your baby brother or sister?”

  “Not really. Family aggravates me,” he drawled.

  I gathered all of my hair and pulled it behind my shoulder. “Do I irritate you?”

  Gabe crossed his arms over his chest and tipped his head to the side. “Yep. But I just think about biting your neck, and it all goes away.”

  My head shot back and I tried not to smile.

  Gabe’s hand floated up to my neck, and he ran his fingers into my hair and tugged me toward him until his face hovered above mine. I felt the sparks of electricity, sparks of anticipation. A single horn honked from the road. Neither of us looked over as more horns honked in rhythm.

  “Let’s find a place,” Gabe murmured into my cheek. His hand under the hem of my shirt. His fingers inched up my side. I had his full attention.

  “Like where?” I asked.

  “Other side of the Mississippi. I bought us a sleeping bag.”

  “You drive me bananas,” I said and laughed into his face.

  His expression flattened.

  “You drive me up a freaking wall,” he said.

  “Yeah, well you drive me across the country just to be near you.”

  His visible anger had subsided.

  “How about I drive you the heck out of here?”

  I held out my open hand. “How about you let me drive so we’re alive when we get there?”

  He strolled to the car and I heard him say, “You got a snowman’s chance in Texas that’ll happen.”

  * * *

  After we crossed the Mississippi, Gabe took it easy. It didn’t last for long. He left the image of his long lost mother back in Tennessee and took on the occupation of racecar driver. I knew he was a mess inside and would be for a long time to come. However, whatever was under the hood of the Mustang was a perfect diversion.

  “This is a monster,” Gabe said an hour later as he forced the odometer into the nineties. “My truck hits ninety-five and that’s it.”

  I closed my eyes and begged him to ease off the gas. When I returned my gaze to the road, we were coming up on a road construction site. Gabe hit the brakes quicker than I could scream for him to stop.

  “There was no warning back there,” he said clearly surprised.

  “There probably was. You were driving too fast to read it!”

  Gabe wove the car into the narrow line of traffic and rode the tail of a Jeep with New York plates.

  “You wanna hitch a ride with them? They’re slow as molasses.”

  I didn’t answer. He had to hit the brakes again and again so he wouldn’t bump their fender.

  “Jeez. This car isn’t made to go slow.”

  We came to a stop. Traffic halted when a man in an orange vest held up a red flag. Gabe rolled down the window.

  “Nice wheels, man,” the guy hollered above the jackhammering. “What’s it got?”

  “Five-O,” Gabe yelled back. “How long do we gotta wait?”

  “Five minutes, tops.” The man held up his fingers.

  The window rolled up. “We’re taking all back roads home. I can’t stand this stop and go baloney.”

  I had nothing to say, so I turned toward the door and studied the missing nail polish on my fingernails. He seemed irritated again.

  “Hey,” he whispered. “I’m fine.”

  “You’re not. I know you couldn’t possibly be fine.”

  “Av’ry, I’m fine.”

  I slid my hands under my legs and bit the inside of my cheek.

  “Do you need me to show you?” he asked.

  I turned my head and looked out into the desolate landscape.

  Gabe shifted in his seat and tugged my shoulder away from the door, forcing me to face him. His jaw chomped on a new piece of gum. I tried to turn back, but he grabbed my head and held me still.

  “You need to be shown,” he said.

  His fingers slid behind my neck, his other hand curled over my thigh, and his watermelon-flavored lips closed in as he leaned across the console. Sparks ignited before he even touched my mouth. My breath locked in my throat, and he kissed me so deeply I became woozy and lightheaded.

  He kissed that good.

  I’d let him do it all the time if he wanted to. Even if he slipped in and out of moods faster than my little sister had tantrums.

  The gum made its way around the forceful kiss. It was a whole new kind of exciting. I tried to focus on his hands and lips simultaneously.

  A horn honked in the rear. Gabe returned his eyes to the road and his hand to the steering wheel. The sensation of his lips remained even though they were across the car. I wanted to pull him over and stop him from smirking. I wanted to stare at his profile. I couldn’t get enough.

  He released the brake and stomped on the gas, making the car growl as it took off and passed the Jeep on the ri
ght.

  “You’re insane,” I said loudly.

  I chewed his gum with pride, fully exhilarated. I felt no shame at all.

  “I think I’m gonna puke.”

  I shot my eyes at Gabe.

  “Who said that?” I asked in an alarming tone. Gabe was still accelerating. “It wasn’t you.”

  It wasn’t me.

  The voice came from the backseat. Gabe’s arm flew over the center divider and hit the sleeping bag.

  “Who’s there?” I asked. “Say something.”

  “Who’s in my car? Answer me now!” Gabe barked.

  He let off the gas, jerked the car onto the grass, slammed the gears into park, and jumped out. I bit my lips as he spun around and folded the seat forward.

  I tugged the sleeping bag from the backseat before he could grab it.

  She was curled up in a ball on the floor, her braid wrapped around her forehead like a headband.

  “Mona?” I asked. “Are you her?”

  “Get the hell out of there!” Gabe shouted.

  The girl moved slowly. “I’m gonna be sick,” she said.

  “Then get out,” he snarled, took her arm and tugged. “It’s not my car. Don’t puke in it.”

  The girl crawled out clumsily and stumbled, landing face-first in the grass. She heaved her guts into the lawn as her whole body trembled.

  Gabe yelled at the top of his lungs, “How did you get in there? Why are you following me?”

  She rolled over and sat cross-legged in the grass and held her head in her hands.

  “You guys sure like to go at it,” she said loud enough for us to hear over the passing cars.

  “What’d you say?” Gabe drawled in a disbelieving tone.

  “Last night and just now. And the other night,” she answered.

  “Last night?” he asked.

  My heart started to thump in my ears. What did she mean by the other night?

  “How did you get the keys to my truck? You stole my wheels and left a note. Who the hell does that? And how did you get in my car?”

  She lifted her head. “I have ways,” she said looking everywhere but at Gabe. “Thought you said it wasn’t your car.”

  “Look at me,” he said and stared her down with the eye of a warden. He stepped closer. “Get up!”

  I held my hand out in front of his face. “Gabe,” I warned.